Strong Arm

I hear all kinds of unfair bargaining going on in my house. Most of the time I bite my tongue and let them develop their negotiating skills without any tutorial. But sometimes I just can't help myself. And this usually occurs by butting in and helping Porter 'know his rights' against the power of his older brother. 


I don't know whose been mentoring Porter, nor do I know if he knows he walked away with a killer deal but today I became aware of one of the most recent barters. Porter walked into my room wearing Dallin's shorts, asking me to help him. I said, "Oooohhh, did you ask Dallin if you could wear those?" Yes, boys have this issue as a point of conflict also believe it or not, and recently it's been more present in our home. It seems, though, the boys have next to squash it already. "Oh yea, we made a deal," Porter said. "I get to wear any of his clothes I want whenever I want. Except for his Colorado jersey {which conveniently Porter has a twinner one} and his Colorado bracelets.  And he gets to play my guitar everyday." Ummmmm, yes. The guitar he received when he was ONE year old. And in the past year has only been of interest to him for ONE day. Must have been the same ONE day Dallin took interest in it as well. And in exchange, Porter got a new wardrobe. It looks like we have a negotiator on our hands- he knows the secret....timing, timing, timing.


We're getting excited for this weekend...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I put it in the predictions folder last Friday {thanks for the concept, Jono} that I think Yosh has done well this year. He's real hit and miss. One year an all-edge brownie pan, the next year a trip to Paris. So you never know. Now I wish I could remember exactly what happened for me to add this note to the folder, but I can't remember anything specific. That might be for the better. Because then based on whether or not I'm right, I would be looking for clues next year to make a judgment call, but Yosh would know what I was or wasn't looking for, and then try to act or not act accordingly. Which would totally throw off the authenticity of my judgment. You get what I'm saying, right?


The kids are going to be in Christmas heaven {and completely self-entertained for hours, inducing mama heaven!} and I'm so ready to see their cute faces with looks of glee glued on!

Merry Christmas!

tid-bits

Does 10 1/2 months qualify for 12ish months? Because I'm sure I read something very professional that said "Babies should start drinking cow's milk at 12ish months". I know, very loose language. But I went with it and am hoping I'm not jumping the gun. I wish you could have seen Kaia with her first bottle of whole milk. She took a few swigs, pulled the bottle out of her mouth, looked at it, and..... literally giggled. Capture that on film and you have a commercial that sells itself. But...I think it gave her the Diarrhea word so we're gonna hold off a bit longer.

Why is Deeter's talking so much fun right now? Well he's a great talker with a great vocabulary but....he's only 2 1/2. Which means context is usually off...which means we do a lot of laughing at/with him. Love that lately when I say, "deeeeter, I love you," he says, "Yea you do."

Porter's teacher told me that the other day he was drawing a stick figure on their discussion board. Porter got all excited and said, "I know what that is. That's a missionary......" No one knew what he was talking about...except the teacher. So he went ahead and drew on a name tag and let that little stick figure be a missionary.

So, I don't know if it is just me, but I am getting the hugest kick out of Dallin's upcoming winter performance. Take a sneak peek:

A proud day in the life of Adam Sandler. I can't imagine that when he was recording his spoof that he thought it would find it's way into mainstream public school music performances. But here it is- 2011- being sung by the masses {ok, well at least in my little town}, representing the Jewish nation. I would of never guessed that in a million years! So tell me I'm not alone....this is hi-larious, right?!!

Welcome back, Saturdays

For fear of messing with any Elf voodoo, this is where Henry spent the rest of his day. The boys found him this morning on our doorknob, which I thought was absolutely brilliant. Apparently, his gymnastic skills weren't quite up to par and pretty fast he found himself face first on the ground. Man up, Henry....we need a STRONG elf in our house!

Great news...starting this week we have our Saturdays back! And Thursday nights! And Friday nights!!! Yes, football and basketball season have come to an end.

It was sweet- the coaches handed out the trophies individually and said something about that player.

Basketball:

Porter- to our strong player who was making shots from way back out by the end of the season.

Dallin- to our player who did it all- dribbled, shot, rebounded.

Football:

Porter- this young man was not even on the team at the start of the year. He started coming to practice, even if his brother couldn't make it, and turned into a good player and someone that was important to the team.

Dallin- this was someone that I've been with for three seasons {right then Dallin stood up to take the stage!}. He's always been a critical player and someone I've been able to depend on to get plays done for me.

One thing about getting older...I love seeing and really grasping the details and sacrifice and recognizing all the little work that goes into making this world go around. Love these adults that take a few hours out of their week to make my kids feel like a million bucks. They've been right all along...it really takes a village.

Summation

Oh I think I survived. You know, sometimes nothing feels as good as alone. And tonight's one of those nights. We've been very much hour by hour here at the Hansen home today. Which implies that things could be a lot worse. So I'm not complaining. But I would like to thank Pandora's Christmas station and some beautifully decorated Christmas homes for giving us a peaceful and muy memorable 25 minutes. Deeter's commentaries added to the night, "Oh MOM, this is an adorable Christmas house." "Oh MOM, I lub the red balls."  Thankfully Yosh already got ours up this year and they look awesome as pictured below.

Totally kidding. We're still holding on to our one strand of pumpkin and ghost lights that never got plugged in and look absolutely ridiculous. But I would love if our house looked like this.

Dallin B was saying his prayers tonight and was going on and on about our friend- whose name I didn't catch- who came to visit and we're so happy bc we haven't seen him in so long and we've missed him etc etc. I finally had to stop him mid-prayer and ask him who the heck he was talking about. "Henry." Oh yea, by some miracle our elf on the shelf arrived this morning at 6:45 just as I heard the kids stretching. Yes, Henry we have missed you. In that same prayer, Dallin prayed that "mom can have help dealing with the kids". That he knows it's hard even though he's not a mom. And he prayed about Dad being strict. Even though moments before him and Porter both said they love me but they love daddy more. And then somehow came back with the consensus that they loved us the same. The charity tie didn't do much for me. But it's kind of funny being a mom and how protective we are of others' relationships- I was almost relieved to hear them say they loved their daddy more. Part of me hopes that's true. Is it because I have no control over that relationship? I don't know.

Anyways, my final thoughts on the funeral that I wanted to get down. At the beginning of last week, as it became apparent my aunt was in her final days and her family was literally gathered around her 24:7 waiting for the final good-bye, my mind kept drifting to a poem that I fell in love with as a young freshman at Ricks College. For the first time though, I felt the words of this poem as I was doing my normal day-to-day chores- making breakfast, shipping kids to school, giving baths, laughing with my husband, etc- and my close family was experiencing heartbreak and anguish deeper than they ever had before. I'm intrigued with the way life jigsaws together. 

I was also aware of the heightened feelings of love and togetherness and closeness at the funeral. How those things that mattered most in life were at the forefront. I was thinking how these were feelings that already existed; they weren't newly created because of the situation. How would it be if we could keep those feelings and thoughts and priorities at the top of the pile instead of letting them sit at the bottom of the stack collecting dust, being expedited to the front only in extreme situations? We'd probably all tweak quite a few decisions and be happier people.

Gretchen was never part of a one-time-world-changing event. So it was very satisfying to look at her life as a whole and see what 59 years of slow, steady, quiet work had produced. And very inspiring. I summed up the overriding message that I walked away with because of her example: DO GOOD. BE GOOD. INFUSE GOOD.

Have a fabulous weekend...I'm sure we all need it!

{Kaia Marie and her namesake. Taken 5/6/11 at Brandon and Kristen's wedding dinner.}

In no Particular Order....

•  Word searches are competing with sports and the Wii for the boys' free time lately. Restaurant etiquette is being transferred to our own dining room table...they are wanting to do the word searches while they're waiting on their food and eating. {No kids, you actually have to help set the table and talk to your dang family during the meal...SORRY!}

                       

• Have you ever read "The Glass Castle"? I bought a rotisserie chicken for dinner last night and once again found myself wishing I had her mad chicken picking skills. I feel like I leave way too much meat on the bird. PS If you haven't read that book, do it. I think you'll like it.
• So lately we've just been having a raw veggie plate sitting around. You know, for snacks, dinner, just whenever. Now we don't force them on the kids- we just have the plate conveniently present. And guess what? They're eating them. And loving them. And so are we... Shoot. Maybe I am "one of those moms." Whatever that means. {But let's be honest...more veggies=more room for Oreos.}

                                               

• Loved yesterday that Yosh gave into my incessant begging for the past 6 1/2 years and finally called in sick to work to unpack our 7 suitcases and just hang out with his sweet wife all day because he was throwing up. Oh I could get used to having that man around all the time. Even if he's sick. Even if he's not unpacking. Isn't it nice just having another human being around?

 

• I am not saying anything. I am not insinuating anything. I am simply stating facts. And in case KARMA is in a bad mood today, I am knocking on wood just in case. Yosh, Dallin, Porter, Deeter, and Kaia have all fallen victim to the stomach bug. I have not.

Sometimes being a brother is even better than being a superhero. ~Marc Brown

After having two kids, somehow I formed an automated response to the much-asked question..."Are you done?" And the answer was something like this: "If it were just for me, I'd be done. BUT...I feel like there's something siblings have to offer each other that I just can't, so I'm going to keep going." To be honest, I almost looked at it as a gift I was giving them. The opportunity of built-in support, advice, love, and friendship.

Thursday afternoon, Dallin came running to the door- screaming- with blood dripping from his face. His brother was right on his heels. We brought him in and doctored him up. Porter sat quietly by his side the whole while, observing but not willing to leave. After all was said and done and they were both still just sitting, I was looking at this the scene from a different room. In real time- right then and there, not later in reflection- I was in awe of the bond these two boys share. In awe, because although it's something we can encourage, it's not something Yosh and I can give to them or force on them. It is their relationship to decide what to do with. A transparent moment showed thus far they've decided to develop, nurture, and protect it.


Throughout the last few years, my mom has made trips to NM on a more than regular basis to check in on her little sister. The last six weeks, she just stayed. Despite the sadness and heaviness of the situation, there was no other place my mom was willing to be. The young summers of driving a million  miles to visit each other, the thousands of phone calls, the hours of chit-chatting....it was all coming to an end. AJ's life paused to solidify the depth of this relationship. The uniqueness was reciprocated as Gretchen was surrounded my many who loved and cared for her, but for the more personal care-taking, she was only willing to let my mom be the care-taker. The end truly represented the culmination of what they had become to each other.


My sweet grandma sat at the rosary in Gretchen's honor, graciously accepting the comfort so many were trying to offer. As Uncle Kip would say in the eulogy...."No parent should have to bury their daughter." And she felt the weight of this unfortunate circumstance, even at 90 years old, loathing the loss. In the side door, located right by where she was sitting, her sister unexpectedly came walking in. As Alby caught sight of her, her raw reaction- back all of a sudden straight, dropped jaw, eyes big- confirmed that real comfort had arrived. As she sat down right next to Alby, and their heads naturally tilted in until they touched, and their hands locked, Alby was now truly able to let someone else share her burden.


"Is solace anywhere more comforting than in the arms of a sister?" ~Alice Walker


Those words I've said so many times- how siblings have something only they can offer each other- were spoken with an innocent shallowness. This week has shed some of that innocence and carved depth in that theory.

We need each other. 

In case you need a laugh....

......take your pick.


-I bent down to pick up Kaia's car seat, threw my arm under the bar, went to stand up........but somehow just got dropped. And went down. On my bum. And then kinda rolled back. All in slow motion. Oh why yes, thanks for asking.... of course I was in public.


-I took the kids for frozen yogurt. They yogurted and topped and we went to pay and I pulled my $20 $2 out of my pocket..........awkward.  I mean are they really going to throw away the yogurt that only we can consume? We had an uncomfortable 2 seconds of eye contact as we looked for the next step. {I don't know how that $3 hid itself in my stroller but thank you.}


-There's this crazy lady that walks around our town with a baby in a Bjorn, one in a stroller, and usually a couple more walking alongside. She gets quite a few "looks". Well, yesterday the smallest boy took off across the street at a semi-busy 4 way stop with no adult in tow. A policeman came out of the woodwork and swooped him up before a car could run him over.............. You already know where this is going. Imagine the death looks I was getting now that they thought the crazy lady couldn't even take care of all her dang kids. As if I wasn't already humiliated....


-Dallin came home from his friend's house telling me about a little tiff- how he got an interception, and how "Harrison was complaining like hell."  I had Dallin B on the phone with his dad in about 2.2.  "No no no, Dallin...verBAtim. You tell your Daddy VERBATIM how the story goes." {"Mom, Dad won't stop laughing...."}


And that's a wrap. Happy Friday!

Just three things.......

1) This is what Tuesday mornings at our house look like:

2) What is proper communication etiquette for blogging? Do I answer in my comment section? In theirs? Personal email? Do I not answer? I'm all about wanting to continue the conversation but don't know how.



3)The letter verification deals. Seriously? Can we make them any harder to read? To buy concert tickets, I need to solve an unreadable puzzle. To post a listing on craigslist, it's as if they're taunting me..."type this if you can." I mean, it's ridiculous the jumble they want me to turn into coherent letters. Killing me, killing me. 

How to Cuss like a First Grader

One of the perks of having a first grader is you always stay up to date on the lingo. The other day Dallin came out in a new basketball outfit and Porter told him he looked hot. Dallin proceeded to inform him, "Porter, you don't say hot for a boy. You say 'sick'. K, you look sick." Porter lapped up the lesson like the hungry little brother he is.


The other day I learned of a new naughty word on the market. Once again, courtesy of our first grader.
DB: "Mom, did you know peanut butter is a bad word?"
Me: "It is?"
DB: "Yea, it is. Okay cuz 'pee'- you know, like you gotta take a pee. Then 'nuts'. You know what those are, right Mom? You know, your privates. Ok, and 'butt'. Then, -er. See, it's a bad word." 


And all I could think about... "my son is talking to me openly about n-u-t-s? He still doesn't know that could be a little bit weird? This is good. I don't think I gave the secret away. Keep a straight face. Hopefully we can keep this open communication going a few more years...."

(PS I'm supposed to be at the gym right now. Instead I'm at the computer in defeat, I have a half-dressed 2 yr old recooping in front of a show after way too much crying and it's only 9:30 am, and a beautifully dressed pumpkin princess rolling around on the ground waiting patiently for her big brother to pull it together. Where's my Diet Coke?........)